For most of April, I avoided FB as much as I could. Being in China most of the month helped immensely (mainland China blocks Facebook). I only checked it when I was messaged, tagged, or for any of Leiden Mamas group stuff. To be honest, IT FELT GOOD. I was getting tired of the negativity, the self-indulgent, the victims, and the serial “sharers”. If you are any one of these, I probably have unfollowed you but I didn’t unfriend you because that’s a slap in the face in the social world. It ain’t that serious, lol.
FB paints a picture of an “idyllic” life. It shows off shiny and expensive things. People share all the highs in their lives. Who wants to be a debbie downer? (Although, people in said “victim” category do that.) Hell, I’m guilty myself! My intent is not to tell someone that my life is better or that this is how they need to live their life. It’s just how FB works. But is that all there is to it? If I listen to society and dwell on the numbers, the wrinkles, the number in my bank account, or even how many “thumbs up” I get, than I am not living my life. I would be living life how society has written it.
Being away from FB has helped me rediscover the ideals that I truly care about. I was reminded about what I wanted to do with my future and what I value most. I now dare to take steps off society’s pathway and I dare to see the world as I wish. And more importantly, I dare to think independently.
What spurred this mini self discovery? In just a month and some odd days, I will be turning 30! In my opinion, when you turn 30 is when you really stop caring about what other say or think. I’m approaching, as society would put it, “the big 3-0”. So I took some time to re-evaluate my relationships and my life in general. In my opinion, it is necessary to do this every 5 years or so. Or every year if you can! I am slowly phasing out the toxic relationships (luckily, there aren’t that many!) and working hard on preserving the genuine ones. I want to surround myself with people who want to see me succeed, people who don’t judge me or my mistakes, people who uplift me and not tear me down and the ones who truly love me unconditionally.
When I look back, I see the long and windy road I’ve been on. It was a rocky and tumultuous road. Road blocks put in place by the real (mean) world and road blocks put in place by ME. Whatever the case, I’ve overcome the obstacles and I am over the moon about where I am.
Turning 30 is a great mile marker for me. As I see it, getting year older is a blessing. Each and every year. To put it frankly, it is a privilege denied to many. So why run from it? Why be ashamed of it?
I know it’s easy to say but eff what society says. The unrealistic beauty standards, the fat shaming, the ridiculous material things magazines say you have to have – it’s all BS.
Embrace the road you took because it shapes who you are today. If you don’t like it, take a different route. YOU determine your path, not someone else.